"Totally Gay", as said by Eric Cartman , best describes South Park
Rally. Instead of crafting worthwhile titles with their South Park
license, Acclaim crafts complete and utter garbage (as seen with
their WWF license for consoles). While the premise behind South
Park Rally seems promising, combine Mario Kart with South Park,
it completely fails in so many respects.
The game design is simple, put South Park characters in
little miniature go-karts and have them complete objectives while
using every trick in the book to win. Objectives include passing
simple checkpoints, holding a cure for mad cow disease for a
couple minutes, and collecting and returning chickens to save
them from "The Chicken Lover". To assist you in winning are
various powerups located around the courses found in floating
multi colored cubes. Powerups range from exploding diarrhea,
giant dildo missiles, fart boosts, to Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo.
One of the major downfalls of South Park Rally is the lack of
characters and tracks available at first. However, once unlocked,
there are plenty of tracks and just about every South Park
character is included. Track locals include the actual town of
South Park, a farm, sewers, Big Gay Al's, the wilderness, and other
locations from the TV show.
As I mentioned before, there aren't many characters or
tracks available after you load up the game for the first time. To
some, this might be frustrating, but to others it could be considered
a challenge. To me, it's a pain in the ass. Not because I don't enjoy
a challenge, but because of the total lack of a save game system.
After you beat a course, another gets unlocked and so do
characters, but this can only be done through championship mode.
Unfortunately, you can't save your game and pick up where you
left off, you are instead forced to replay through all the tracks you
have already beaten. By the time I actually got to Big Gay Al's, I
was bored of the game or I had something better to do. In addition
to a lack of save game feature, Acclaim has also implemented a
credit system where you are given 5 credits and have no chance to
earn more. What this means is you must be a master at all the
tracks you've already beaten before you should even consider
plopping down to unlock some new courses. The last time I
checked my computer didn't cost $99 at Toys-R-US, so what's with
the console save game and credit system Acclaim?
Graphically South Park Rally doesn't dazzle at all,
maybe a few years ago, but not in the year 2000. South Park Rally
attempts to take advantage of 3D rendering, but doesn't do much
with it in the end. There are a few flashy effects every now and
then, nothing that makes you say "Wow!" though. One thing I did
enjoy was the detail in the characters. That's not saying too much
considering the crappy South Park animation, most of the
characters look just like they do on TV, except with a little 3d
Gameplay isn't solid and its not addicting. Creating a
game where you race little karts around a track isn't terribly hard,
making it unique is. As I progressed through the various tracks I
got bored with the objectives for each one, find this return it blah,
blah, find the bow and arrow and shoot people blah, blah. Maybe
they should have just stuck with a traditional style and made it a
pure racing game around various tracks. South Park addicts will
probably just love the objectives however, and I mean addicts,
kids with South Park bongs and Cartman stickers on their trucks
(you all know the losers I'm talking about). All the objectives are
more or less taken straight from the show, which can be comical at
first but its allure quickly fades. There is just so many times you
can shoot Big Gay Al with a giant dildo before it gets old.
Sound effects are just about the only thing South Park
Rally has going for it, at first. I loved hearing Cartman saying
"Yeah I want some cheesy poofs" and "Sweeet", but after a couple
of hours with the game, I just decided to put on music rather than
listen to the same old lines. Speaking of music, the sound track to
SP Rally is horrible, its even laughable at times. I turned it off after
the first race, fans of weird technoish crap might enjoy it though.
When I saw the multiplayer option listed on the menu I
was dreaming of racing against my fellow Game Over staffers, but
I was quickly disappointed. The only connection type supported is,
you guessed it LAN. I know a lot of people have LANs, but I don't.
Folks without a LAN will find themselves wondering, "why the hell
did I buy this game?!" While people with a LAN will find
themselves wondering after a few days, "why the hell did I buy this
While my feelings about South Park Rally started off on
a positive note, they quickly went downhill after a couple of hours.
The lure of South Park characters racing around the TV show
locations died very quickly mainly because of the lack of
innovation in course design, so-so gameplay and lack of a save
game feature. Only truly diehard fans will enjoy this game, the
average South Park viewer won't be addicted for too long, and if
you don't watch the TV show don't even bother. This game totally
sucks ass Mmmmkay?